Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Soft Snowflakes Falling

Sun behind clouds reflecting off of freshly fallen snow, a soft and gleaming light. 

Books, Bible, journal, devotional all spread out on couch waiting to be touched, to give warmth and light to my cold and weary soul.

From the gospels I read Matthew 11:28-30 "Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for you souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light." From the Psalms I read Psalm 23 "The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside quiet waters. He restores my soul; He guides me in the paths of righteousness for His name's sake. Even thought I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil, for You are with me; your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; You have anointed my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and lovingkindness will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever."

I am being challenged to believe, to trust, to hope, to know, to experience the scriptures. As I read the Bible do I actually believe what I am reading? To I believe that His burden is easy and light or would I rather try life out my own way? Why do I think and seem to believe that I know best? Why? I am dust from the ground, I am a breath, here one day and in the next I am no longer. And yet God, He is forever, He has no beginning and no end, wouldn't He know best? Wouldn't He be trustworthy? He created me, He loves me, He has a plan for me, and not just any old generic plan but a special plan that has my name on it! He restores my soul...for His name's sake, not mine, His. But how can He restore my soul while I walk through the valley of the shadow of death? Didn't He lead Jesus into the desert to be tested by the devil for 40 days (Matthew 4:1-11)? Didn't He hide Moses in the mountain, in the dark while He passed by and showed him His back (Exodus 33:18-23)? Am I willing to be lead into the desert? I am willing to hidden in the darkness of a cave to see God? Do I cry out "Send me!" "Pick me!"? Or am I too busy with my own plans that try to keep me in the "light" away from the muck and grime of this life? But is light seen in light? Not really. Am I willing to see, to experience the darkness, the muck, the grime if that is where I see the Lord moving, working, calling me too? Am I willing to let Him shine His light through me no matter where it takes me and what it may lead me through?

Soft snowflakes fall at leisure to the ground. It is peace. They are falling from the white sky to the dark ground, and I can't seem to see the white flakes until they come in contact with the dark, cold ground. Because they are in contrast with it. They are fluffy and white. The ground is dark and hard. The contrast. What am I in contrast with?

Jesus thank you for the soft snowfall outside. Thank you for the warmth of tea from my red kettle and fuzzy socks on my feet. Thank you for big windows to see Your glory through. Thank you for the restoration of my soul. Father mold me, make me, keep me in Your hands. And as Mary said to the angel "Behold, the bond slave of the Lord; may it be done to me according to your word." Your will be done Father God, not my own.