Tuesday, August 28, 2012

I Don't Want to Forget...

 I have a job. That statement still feels surreal and I'm not sure if it's true. But it is. Through God's grace, I have a job.

And that is what I don't want to forget. Him. His grace. His provision. I don't want to forget about the Lord now that I have what I asked for. I don't want to leave Him out of this new journey. I don't want to live life without Him, at least until I "need" Him again.

I don't want to forget my need for Him. I need Him all the time. Though after the dust settles and life calms down, it is easy to forget about the daily need for Him. It's easy to forget the battle that was just won, and Who won it.

Why? Why is it so easy to forget? Number one, Satan hates us relying on God and will step in as soon as possible to make us think that we don't need Him. Number two, life is busy. And it is easy to let the business take us, not stopping to take time to spend with our Father. I'm sure there are more, but those are the two that I feel are pulling me away at the moment.

In one of my interviews with Compassion, I told them that wherever the Lord provided a job, I wanted my office space to be filled with quotes and scripture that would encourage and challenge me. Sometimes my perfectionist spirit gets in the way and makes me feel like I cannot try something because what if it's not right? What if I fail?

If I fail, God's grace is sufficient. 

I know that it can be hard for me to keep my eyes on Christ and to have a good attitude when I feel unprepared and ill-qualified. But that is when I need to turn to Him the most. To cling to the promise that He is in control, that nothing will take Him by surprise, and that I am His child. No matter what happens, I am His child.

So in light of these revelations, I have been looking up quotes and scriptures that I would like to surround myself in my new office space. Here are a few examples:

 Always take chances #quote  Honesty  Ephesians 4:2  

AMEN!  <3  To not be afraid...  

   Patience...  Plato  

May You be glorified through my life. May I remember Your grace and mercy; Your provision; Your peace and wisdom. May I remember You, spend time with You, and seek You even when life appears "easy". For You are God and I am not, whether life is easy or hard at the moment, You are still God. Don't let me forget You. And if I do, remind me Father, in Your love and mercy remind me of Who You are and what You have done. May I set up memorial stones (Joshua 4), like the Israelites after they crossed the Jordan, to remember the battle that was won. Thank You...Amen.

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Real Life {The Job Search Is...OVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!}

Praise the Lord! I just received a call and I will officially be employed at Compassion Canada on September 10, 2012.

God is SO good!

I wasn't supposed to receive a call until tomorrow, which meant that I was going to have to come home from being gone all day to listen to a voice mail letting me know if I was employed or not. But the Lord was so gracious and He gave me the opportunity to chat with my new employer for about 20 minutes on the phone about my new position in the Contact Center.

There will be lots of training and hopefully lots of quick learning on my part. But I am so grateful to be employed after being in Canada for a year. What a wonderful anniversary present!

I have no words to express my gratitude right now or the joy that is just gushing from my heart. 

Father I thank You for this wonderful opportunity. May I glorify You through this new journey. 
I ask for quiet confidence in who I am in You, and that I will learn quickly. I give over to You 
any stress that I may encounter. I ask Your blessing upon the friendships that I will establish
 there, may they honor and glorify You. May my attitude be pleasing to You, 
may this heart that You are shaping be a light for You. Amen.

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Real Life {And the Journey I'm In}

Does your Bible look like this? There are some passages where I don't have any more room to write:)

Over the last few months I have been reading the Word along side other women over at #SheReadsTruth. I have been challenged and I have learned so much with this group of women. It has been a great encouragement to me ever since I found it just a few short months ago.

So I thought I would give you some snapshots of what my time with #SheReadsTruth looks like.

There's lots of praying, seeking the Lord, meditating, and putting my own words down on paper as I struggle through different passages of scripture.

Today has been hard because I have been struggling under the stress of still not knowing if I have a job or not. I had a second interview last Monday and I was told that I would be called by this Friday, that's a long time for this heart to wait.

Today I was stressed. I felt incompetent to complete the tasks I needed too in order to get this company all the information they needed to complete a background check. I felt totally out of my comfort zone and stretched to the limit.

And yet, I am right where God wants me. He knows right where I am, and He is right here with me. He is my Mediator, and what a comfort that is! I have prayed over and over that whatever happens with this employment opportunity, that He would be glorified. That He would become more and that I would become less.

I believe that happened today.

So whatever happens, I pray with all my heart that He would be glorified. That He would be praised in my life and in my future employers whoever they may be. 

Today, as I sank deeper and deeper into the stress. I came here... Bible Gateway where I looked up Proverbs 14 & 15 in several different versions as I read alongside other #SheReadsTruth ladies.

To my journal where I wrote down verses that spoke to me and convicted me.

I came to Jesus. The Author and Perfecter of my faith.

He is the only Place that I will ever find rest. He is the only One that will never leave me nor forsake me. He is my Comforter, my Prince of Peace, my Saving Grace, my All in All, my Righteousness.

He is my Everything.

Father, today I pray that we see You in our daily lives today. That we would seek You and give You all the praise and honor You are due. That we would magnify Your name rather than our own. May You be praised today and every day. Amen.

Monday, August 13, 2012

Real Life {Nerves...and then comes...The Hoping & Waiting}

Today I went in for a second interview at a wonderful company (I'm not going to tell you where, that will stay a surprise and I'll let you know where if I get the job). It was absolutely wonderful and totally unnerving!

I was so nervous leading up to this interview. My first one I wasn't nervous at all and this one, wow, it was crazy, my legs were actually shaking as I was putting on my makeup this morning. I don't know what had me so riled up, but whatever it was, I was not going to have it.

I didn't want to be nervous. I wanted to be excited, hopeful, but not nervous. When I'm nervous my personality disappears and I become a bumbling idiot...not exactly a promising attribute! I didn't want to be nervous because being nervous puts the focus and pressure on me rather than focusing on Christ and His promises.

When I was going in for my first interview, my dad sent me a text and told me that he was holding onto the promise that the Lord loves to give his children good gifts. That was an amazing text to receive and I have begun to cling to that promise as well.

That doesn't mean that if I don't get this job that God doesn't give good gifts, it just means there is another opportunity out there that He is just waiting to give me. It really encourages me and keeps my focus on trusting and believing in Christ and His provision rather than in myself and my personal abilities.

So today I am clinging to hope. I am clinging to a God who loves me more than I could possibly imagine. I am crying out in thanksgiving for the opportunity to shine His light. I am choosing to not worry and to not be anxious. I am choosing the Lord who is my life. I am choosing love, which is both an action and a Person. I am choosing to trust and believe that His ways are higher than my ways, that He has everything in the palm of His hand, and that He is in control.

I am choosing to let God be God. To give over my worrisome 
burdens and rest in His mercy and grace.

I will find out next Friday (August 24) if I have a job or not. So right now I am stuck with quite a bit of waiting. But I will continue to cling to my Savior who will never leave me nor forsake me. Who walks with me through this journey we call life. May He be glorified in the waiting.

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

What Do I Have to Give?

Lately, Satan has been feeding the lie that I have nothing to give. Not that I am the best thing ever or anything, but through Christ, each one of us has a story and therefore has something to give and share with the rest of us.

Each of us share differently. Some in obvious ways, some not. 
But we can never forget that we each have a story and our story is not for us alone but it is to shared.

I have forgotten over the last few weeks. I have forgotten that I have a story. That my story is God's story. And that He has given me a place designed specifically to share His story, and that place is right here. 

Sometimes I feel like nothing is going on, that life is in a way boring at that particular moment so what could I possibly have to share? But it's not about me, and what I have to share. It's about Christ and what He has to share.

Writing here is about putting away my selfishness and opening up to the Spirit's leading. It's about sharing the ups and downs, the boring and the exciting, the struggle in finding a job, the excitement for an important interview, the time spent on vacation with my parents, the marriage that I am constantly growing and learning in. 

This is my safe place. Which is strange to me because many who read these words I have not even met before, but I have a peace here. I have an open spirit here that is often closed to the "outside world". After all the quote, "I write better than I talk" describes me perfectly.

And in light of that fact, God gave this blog. A place to grow in grace and love. To be open and honest in the midst of my struggles and failures. To share His story that is my life. 

Because, it is all about Him. Everything. Every moment, every joy, every hurt, every mistake, every selfless act, every selfish act.

As I choose to begin sharing once more, I pray that I will remember in the so-called "boring times" of life to share His story in the midst of it. I pray that I won't give into the lie that I have nothing to share because it's not about me it is about Christ, and He always has something to share.

Last night as these truths began to resonate in my heart, the Lord opened my eyes to all that I had been learning and neglecting to share over the past few weeks. 
  • We are going through an amazing study of the life of Gideon in church on Sunday's and it has been incredible! Every week it doesn't seem like I can write quick enough to capture it all.
  • We have just started a young adults program at church and we are going through The Truth Project. I have never been through this study before and am really enjoying the spirituality and academics that are interwoven throughout each week.
  • I am still searching for a job, but I have a very exciting interview Thursday (tomorrow) morning at 10am. I would covet your prayers as I continue to seek Christ in the midst of the search and I long to be where He wants me to be, no matter where that might be.
I'm sure there is more that has happened that needs to be shared, but these are the things that are heavy on my heart at the moment. Praying that the Lord will be glorified today, through these words and through our lives as we seek Him. Have a blessed day and may His grace and peace be with you.