"You cannot stay where you are and go with God at the same time."
"Obedience is costly to you and to those around you."
"Obedience [to God] requires total dependence on God to work through you."
Experiencing God Study
These statements have given me new insight and freedom from guilt as I think of the different paths my life has taken over the years. Sometimes I would look back and think, God why did that happen? Or why did it happen that way? It seemed so painful for me and for those around me. Sometimes I knew that I was disobeying God, and other times I knew I was following Him. And yet many times, when it seemed to hurt the most was when I was truly following and obeying the Lord. I never understood why that would be and it led me to many fears and doubts.
"O God, it is You who knows my folly,
And my wrongs are not hidden from you."
"Search me, O God, and know my heart;
Try me and know my anxious thoughts;
And see if there be any hurtful way in me,
And lead me in the everlasting way."
And yet God knows my heart, He and He alone can truly know my heart and give peace where He sees purity and conviction where He sees sin. What a blessing to believe in His Sovereignty, to truly believe that His ways are not my ways, and that He is able to make all things beautiful in their time. Not my time, but His time; not my ways, but His ways. Will I trust Him? Will I live out my belief that He does all things well? That there is always beauty in the midst of chaos, thankfulness in the midst of the pain, and joy, there is always joy to be found in the character of Jesus Christ. The One who died for me and washed me white as snow. The One who calls me to Himself, who is always with me, who loves me with an everlasting love, and who intimately knows my struggles and never leaves me to fight through them on my own. What a friend I have in Jesus. What love that is freely given.
Jesus You are God and I am not. I have been living in a state of guilt when I think on my failures during my times of running from you, and even during my times of obedience that didn't turn out the way that I thought they should. Forgive me for not living in light of Your Healing touch, for not acknowledging that You can use anything for Your glory, and You have. Oh you have! Thank You for opening my eyes to Your forgiveness, Your power, Your grace, Your provision, Your love.
Jesus thank You...
...for Your revelation.
...for Your grace freely given.
...for the freedom that You offer if I would but take it, and I claim that freedom now Father.
...that You are God and that I am not.
...that You see the whole tapestry while I only see a corner.
...for being Jehovah Shammah "the LORD is there".