Show Me How To Die...

"Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit." ~ John 12:24 (NASB)

"Listen carefully: Unless a grain of wheat is buried in the ground, dead to the world, it is never any more than a grain of wheat. But if it is buried, it sprouts and reproduces itself many times over. In the same way, anyone who holds on to life just as it is destroys that life. But if you let it go, reckless in your love, you'll have it forever, real and eternal." ~ John 12:24 (The Message)

 Show Me by Audrey Assad

You could plant me like a tree beside a river
You could tangle me in soil and let my roots run wild
And I would blossom like a flower in the desert
But for now just let me cry

You could raise me like a banner in the battle
Put victory like fire behind my shining eyes
And I would drift like falling snow over the embers
But for now just let me lie

Bind up these broken bones
Mercy burn and bring me back to life
But not before you show me how to die

Set me like a star before the morning
Like a sun that steals the darkness from a world asleep
And I'll illuminate the path You've laid before me
But for now just let me be

Bind up these broken bones
Mercy burn and bring me back to life
But not before You show me how to die
No, not before You show me how to die

So let me go like a leaf upon the water
Let me brave the wild currents flowing to the sea
And I will disappear into a deeper beauty
But for now just stay with me
God, for now just stay with me

I long to die to this world, to this life here on earth so that I might live in Christ alone. To die to the distractions that pull me every way but towards Christ. To live IN Christ. To be aware of Him living in me. Longing to mold me like only He can. But I pull and struggle to take back "my life" as soon as I lay it at His feet. Why? Because I am sinful, and I lose sight of the wonder, the glory. I lose sight of Christ displayed in His creation all around me because I won't sit, be still, and let Him be God. As soon as I give up my desires, as soon as I utter the words "not my will but Yours be done", Satan jumps in to distract me before I live in that attitude too long. Before I settle into the peace, into the grace, into the wonder, into the LIFE of Jesus Christ. But no matter how many times I get distracted. I will always come back to my Father, and He will always take me back. He will lead me beside quiet waters, He will calm the storm around me...or He will calm His child in the midst of the storm, He will take my burdens upon Himself and grant me rest. So here I am Jesus. Show me how to die to myself, and grow in You. For that is the only LIFE that is worth living.